Waiting

Today was Jacob’s day at school. After dropping him off and taking Natalie to her Spanish class, I had 35 minutes to myself by the time I accounted for travel time to & from home. I treasured that time. It was precious beyond precious. All of a sudden I had this awesome view of what lies ahead next year. When both Jacob and Natalie will be in elementary school, I will have 2 whole days from 9:30am-3:00pm to myself. Wow. Unthinkable. I am waiting in happy anticipation.

Why is it that tonight with both kids tucked in bed by 6:30pm, with the whole night ahead of me, I don’t feel like doing anything around the house? For some very, very odd reason I only feel like doing chores in the morning, at the start of my day. At the end of the day I just feel like curling up on the couch and reading, or sitting at the computer catching up with emails or Facebook. Why is that? There’s something about the morning that puts me in the mood to clean and tidy-up. Definitely don’t feel that at night. At night I just want to unwind. Right now that poses a significant problem- because it’s my night time that I currently have free when the kids are tucked in bed and sound asleep. So I end up living with laundry undone, bathrooms that need cleaning, dirty dishes in the sink and a pantry that desperately needs re-organizing and a good cleaning out. What’s my deal? Somehow I just need to plow through it even though I don’t feel like doing any of it in the evening hours.

So I’m going to keep dreaming of the day next year when two days a week I will have that glorious morning time. And for now somehow force myself to do housework at night. Now that I’ve written about it, identified my need to just suck it up and figure out a way to go against what I desire most to do with my evening time, I’m going to log off and give it a try. Alright, here it goes…….

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